I've lost 50 pounds! And I'm not talking British money, baby!

Well as most of you know, the past 11 months I have really been trying hard to lose weight. Namely the baby weight that has crept on from my two pregnancies in two years. Well, I am 3 pounds away from reaching the 50 pound mark! This is both an accomplishment and sort of an embarressment. I am happy that I have almost reached my goal but the other part of me is kind of disgusted that I let it go that far. My weight has always been an issue with me. In high school I always thought I was "fat". Looking back, I would K-I-L-L to be that size but I was in fact bigger than most of the other girls. The fact that I was 6 feet tall didn't help the matter, either. I would always tell myself that I would marry "the tallest guy" I could find. Enter Ned, who's 6' 7''! That was a mere coincidence as I would never marry someone just for thier height. Anyway, back to the weight thing...so when I got married I felt like I was the thinnest I had really ever been. But soon after I gained the dreaded "newlywed 20" as I call it. Anyway, I had Tatum after 3 years of marriage and while I didn't really gain a ton of weight, I did gain some and I just had grown so accustomed to the extra 10 pounds that I just kind of went along and forgot about it. Then I got pregnant with my Carson. Again, I didn't gain too much with him either but the newlywed 20, combined with 15 pounds from Tatum AND Carson piled up to be a big problem. It seemed like all at once I was just big. It was hard for me because Ned is a former College athlete and has always prided himself on being healthy and in shape. I went through a depression about it for about 6 months. I didn't know what to do or where to start. I kept waiting for that "ah-ha" moment that everyone talks about. I seriously thought I would just have this life changing moment where all of a sudden I would get up and run 5 miles and never eat another cookie again and life would be better because I would be thinner. I am here to tell you...the "ah-ha" moments don't exist. They just don't. One of my favorite spiritual thoughts is that Heavenly Father doesn't make you patient or a missionary or a good mom or whatever. He gives you opportunities to become what you want. So if we want to be a member missionary, He doesn't all of a sudden go "you're a great missionary". No, He gives you chances and experiences that eventually lead to being the person you want to become. Well it's the same with being healthy. It is impossible to one day wake up and be perfect at working out and eating right. But we can't focus on that, and we have to take it one opportunity at a time. I am grateful that my friend, Amy Ellis came into my life when her husband got stationed at NAS Whidbey and moved into the Ward and right down my street. She had wanted to lose weight and had been walking around the neighborhood. I asked if I could join her and that became our daily routine. Soon we were walking 5 miles a day and when the weather got too cold, we switched to the gym on base. Now I am working out everyday at the gym with my sister in Utah and lifting weights and really watching my diet. It's hard. Every day is a struggle but the changes in my life have been amazing. It has been both a physical and spiritual transformation. And of course, I still have work to do. I am not there yet, and I may never look like "the ideal woman" and that's ok. Anyway I wanted to share my personal story in hopes that someone out there can take something from it. I never thought I would be able to share a story about me losing 50 pounds. I thought I would always been destined to heaviness. But as I get older I am realizing that we have the incredible gift of choice and the ability to change! So that's my story and it's not over yet. I will be on this journey the rest of my life and I appreciate you coming along for the ride!

You know you're in Utah if...

So I've been here in Utah for two weeks now staying with my sister Amy and my in-laws on the weekend. I am fully recovered from the flu which is a huge relief. Next year I will be completely paranoid and carry hand sanitizer everywhere I go. Anyway things here have been going ok. The kids have had a harder time adjusting than I had planned on. Carson, even though he is 16 months is really aware that Ned is gone and he's missing Dad. Tatum has decided that it's now ok to hit, talk back and throw fits on a whim. So I am trying to work out those issues, but these things take time. But since being in Utah I have noticed a couple things that are just odd to me. Now keep in mind, it is possible to be in Utah, but not of Utah. These apply to the latter...The first is, the ladies here wear too much makeup. I know that's a general statement but I mean...what is the deal? The girls here just seem like Barbie dolls half the time. Anyway, maybe I'm just jealous or something, but Ned actually read a study that Salt Lake City has the highest per capita spending on makeup, hair dye and other beauty products. I am not suprised. Anyway, the other thing is I am now feeling like a complete failure for only having two kids. Today my sister's friend dropped by to pick up supplies for her son's "Superman" birthday cake. This woman had four children under the age of 5. I repeat, under the age of 5. Let's give that lady a medal or something because I am barely hanging on with my two! And please, don't get me started on Utah drivers. Not only am I being honked at on the interstate for going the snail's pace of, oh...85 miles an hour...these folks are crazy! I think the state of Utah should conduct MANDATORY tests for color blindness. I am certain that the drivers here are mistaking the color Yellow for Green, and Green for Red because Red can be Green if they want it to. Wow. I am amazed. Anyway, aside from the quirks of this place it's nice to be around lots of family and friends and get my mind off of how much I am missing my sweetheart. I will have lots of pictures fromt he weekend up by Sunday. Miss you all!

~Things I am missing about Ned tonight~

I miss Ned rough housing with Carson and Tatum!
I miss making Ned scrambled eggs late at night, the boy loves scrambled eggs!
I miss Ned's smile and laugh.
I miss Ned coming home from work and giving me a big hug before he does anything else.
I miss Ned's crazy voices that he does. They always make me laugh.
I miss having Ned's arm around me at church!
I miss Ned's guitar hero serenades.
I miss the way Ned always checks on the kids at night to give them one more hug and kiss.
I miss the smell of starch in the laundry room from Ned's uniforms.


I could go on and on about the things I miss when Ned is deployed. But for now, I am just grateful he's safe and that I will have all these things again when he comes home. We miss you!

We spent Easter at the James' in Salt Lake today. The kids had a good day there and enjoyed all the fun things that go along with Easter. I really was missing Ned today, but had a great day at Church and was thankful to send Tatum to Primary and Carson to Nursery with Grandma!

Here are some pictures of the kids doing thier Easter baskets and egg hunt!

At the Zoo!

I know it has been forever since my last post. Ok, a week...but for me it has felt like a lot longer. So here's the deal: Tatum and I were both DREADFULLY sick with the flu. Then in the throws of the flu Carson got a double ear infection. THEN that night all of my lymph nodes began to swell so big that it looked like I had a donut around my neck. I felt at the end of my rope until my sister, Amy saved the day. She had been planning to fly up next week for a visit but changed her flight to a same-day one. She flew up and helped take care of my kids and allowed me to get the rest that I needed. I had originally planned on driving down to Utah for about a month with her. But because she came early, I ended up going to Utah early as well. So here we are for about two months just kind of hanging out in SLC. But it's nice, I have a lot of family to visit and old friends. I am still getting over this illness so pictures may be few and far between, but keep checking back!

Ok, it's official. I am really missing Ned. This past week and a half has been so hard- we have all had the flu and Carson has a double ear infection. I am still really sick and swollen and not feeling any better. I put this song up on my blog because it's my favorite and reminds me what a sweetheart I have for a husband. Hopefully this illness will be over and done with as quickly as it all came.

Avril Lavigne - When You're Gone

When You're Gone

Bravo Zulu Sailor of the quarter!

The best thing about having a blog is you don't have to wait until your Christmas newsletter to brag about your hubby! I got the word from Ned today that we can officially announce Ned is Sailor of the quarter! THIS IS A HUGE DEAL! Every quarter each Chief nominates the Sailor they think deserves this award. Then all the Command leadership gets together and decides which of the nominees gets the award. Ned won this quarter and we are so proud of him. This is due to all of his hard work and efforts in uniform and all the extra things he does outside of work that makes him outstanding. The one thing that really helped him get it is his work with the Cub Scouts. Go church callings! Anyway, I'm a proud Navy Wife today and I'm keeping my fingers crossed for Sailor of the year!

Tatum has been so brave this week while she's been down with the flu. Through it all, she has still managed to be a big helper for me. I decided to reward her with something new. For weeks, she as been eyeing these Hannah Montana purses in the shape of a guitar. In some background information, Ned loves Guitar Hero. So he has two controllers for the game and Tatum would get one controller and Ned would get the other. It was so cute to watch the two of them bond and have fun. So when she saw these purses, she not only is reminded of Guitar Hero...she remembers how special her Daddy is to her and how many wonderful times they spend together!

Ok, you all know I'm a huge product plugger. I promise I'm not getting paid secretly to do this or anything. HOWEVER, I just have to publicly thank whoever invented the thin strip cough medicine. Liquid medicines and my children are like oil and water. They don't mix. So anyway, if you are ever needing to try something new, give these a chance because they really worked for Tatum. She hates medicine. I will not lie...she didn't like the taste. But, you just put it on thier tongue and let them immedietly swallow some water with it and it's a lot less messy and a lot less stressful than nasty smelling liquid spilling everywhere, sticky clothes. Sticky hands. Stick hair...need I go on with the stickiness? Plus, they work really great. I really try hard not to give my kids a lot of medicine. I am kind of into the herbs and natural stuff. But hey, if your baby girl has the flu, she has the flu and needs some cough medicine.

Carson puckering up...a big kiss for Mommy. Thanks, love!

I have always told myself that while Ned is gone I could handle just about anything...except me being sick. Really sick. Well, my fears came to be a reality this week. Tatum woke up with the flu on Tuesday. She was miserable. Luckily it wasn't accompanied by a sick stomach. But she felt awful. I woke up with it as well fo Friday and it has been a rough couple of days. Aside from my pregnancies with morning sickness, I have never felt so awful. I finally contacted some friends for a Blessing and Tatum and I are both doing a lot better. Thanks for everyone for thier calls and concern. It's hard to be without Ned, and I'm grateful to know there are so many who care for us. The big lesson learned for me is to always have soda and popsicles on hand and a medicine cabinet that is stocked with every imaginable remedy. In the meantime, rest will be the keyword for the weekend.

More from Ned!

Here are some pictures of Ned's adventures at Sea. He found these sea shells and Tatum is really excited to see them. We miss you, sweetie...be safe!

Pictures from Neddie!

Ned sent some pictures to me from when he was in Tokyo recently. It was such a suprise to get them and it made me so happy to see his smiling face. I just thought I'd pass them on to you all.

Captain Charming

I often use "Captain" as a nickname for Carson. Ok, Ok, I admit...I have about 50 nicknames for each of my little sweeties. But nonetheless, Captain is one of them. Anyway, I just couldn't resist this adorable shirt for my little heartbreaker! I just don't know what I would do if I didn't have Carson's sweet smiles and warm hugs everyday. They most definately keep me going.

Mommy's little helper!

Tatum is such a great help to me. It is a blessing that she is such a sweet and cooperative little girl who is willing to learn and try new things. She helps bring me Carson's diapers whenever I need her to, she helps me make all the beds, she cleans up her room everyday. She also helps me unload the dishwasher, too! Thanks Tatum for all of your help.

We love Daddy!

Tatum and Carson's favorite thing to do is look at our blog and also some video messages he left for them. I just love that the kids adore thier Daddy. It is precious.

Having some laughs before bedtime!

The family is but an early Heaven.

- Unknown

Happy Anniversary!

Today Ned and I celebrated our 6th wedding anniversary. Even though Ned's out to sea right now, we are together in spirit. It has been a wonderful 6 years for us. No, things haven't always been perfect. Things haven't always gone our way. But everyday has been a blessing to be by each other's side. Ned is my strength and my inspiration. I appreciate all that he does for our family-Navy life is hard and requires personal sacrifices from our everybody. But I'm grateful to Ned being a hard worker and always having a great attitude. Above all, Ned has given me the greatest gift this life could bring: motherhood. Being a Mom is the most rewarding experience. I am so happy that I have my sweet husband to raise our dear family with. Thanks, Neddie. You are my best friend. Here's to many more anniversaries.

Do you like my new outfit?

Here's Tatum posing before church today. I had gotten her a new outfit today and she made it a point to ask EVERYONE at church "do you like my new outfit?"

Tatum enjoying a bedtime treat!

I just love this face that Carson is making. It is his classic expression and reminds me of his adorable personality. (Pay no attention to the corndog, please. It has been a really long week. I promise I feed my kids vegetables!)

Carson...you are BUSTED! He loves to get into our closet and pull down clothes. Namely, Ned's ties!